4 types of developers that roam the cubicle forest
I’m always telling everyone that I’m not a programmer, not an analyst, not a trainer not a tech support guy, not a technical writer or presales… I’m a problem solver.
If there’s a problem, I’ll be able to solve it… and if not, by God, I’ll die trying. Just ’cause that’s the type of person that I was brought up to be. And that’s how I see things.
That’s the kind of attitude that seems to piss people off these days. If you’re not a bean-counting, pencil pushing, job hating little twerp, well, you must be the enemy.
So, based on what I feel and some tweet I saw today (must be this one by @JohnMSaunders ) (side note: that’s how you steal ideas these days), here are my 4 types of developers that roam the workplace:
1. The doers – now these are the guys that build stuff for the fun of it. They like a good challenge from time to time and they beat it. Their superpower is laziness and they know how to use it to build great stuff, really fast. You can recognize junior doers by the fact that they nose around asking dumb questions… after a hundred questions, they start smarting up.
2. The watchers – these are the guys that crawl around just watching the doers do stuff and saying to one another things like “they’re gonna do it, you’ll see” or “we’d better look busy, maybe they’ll ask for help”.
3. The clueless – these are the guys that are still employed because either nobody knows who they are or because nobody knows what they’re doing. Usually they’re seen playing weird farming games on known social networks for half a day before going to lunch for 2 hours. You can spot them because they keep saying “what just happened? we did what?”. As bad as they are, these are still good guys… they help with things that are not really important, and it usually takes them a while.
4. The problem – well, you can’t have problems without a trouble maker, do you? These guys just keep screwing up… like they’re malevolent or something. The worst part is that some of them are. Some of them eventually wise up, other… well, let’s say they fall prey to natural selection. But some of them, they’re like organizational ticks that you can’t find; like you’re stuck with them. I usually try to weed them out but that’s just me.
So, in conclusion, if you’re not doing something about a problem, watching other guys try to fix it, not knowing if somebody is working on it… you might be the problem.